Since, then, you have been raised with Christ, set your hearts on things above, where Christ is, seated at the right hand of God.. And whatever you do, whether in word or deed, do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him. Wives, submit yourselves to your husbands, as is fitting in the Lord. Colossians 3:1,17-18

I have heard so much bad teaching on submission, suggesting women don’t want to make decisions, or worse, aren’t capable of good ones, and therefore, in their inferior state, need a man to make decisions for them. Sometimes the call to submission is confused with a demand for slavish obedience. These claims don’t sit well with many women, and the bad teaching often causes the whole concept to be ignored. The best teaching I heard, that I could finally accept, was from Rich and Marti Carlson during our pre-marriage counseling: I don’t submit because I am inferior, but out of reverence to Christ; in submitting to my husband, I am submitting to Christ’s will for me.

This past week, God gave me new insight into this controversial topic.  I’d been studying Colossians 3.  It seemed a bit of a disconnect to go from ^“Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, since as members of one body you were called to peace. And be thankful.  Let the message of Christ dwell among you richly as you teach and admonish one another with all wisdom through psalms, hymns, and songs from the Spirit, singing to God with gratitude in your hearts.  And whatever you do, whether in word or deed, do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him” (verses 15-17) to “Wives, submit yourselves to your husbands, as is fitting in the Lord.” (verse 18)  But suddenly, they connected.

I am to set my mind on things above, on Christ. Jesus chose to submit not only to his loving and good heavenly Father, but also to the soldiers who nailed his hands and feet to the cross. Being submissive is another opportunity to not just follow Christ’s example, but also to have fellowship with him. Jesus didn’t submit to others around him because he was somehow inferior, unable or unwilling to make his own decisions, out of any kind of second-class status. Far from it. It was love, humility, obedience, and trust in his heavenly Father that motivated and enabled him to do that. That makes it beautiful. And yes, there is mutual submission (Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ. Ephesians 5:21), but if I insist on that (“I will only submit to you if you submit to me”), I miss something of Him.

Jesus, thank you that you have gone before me in every way and invite me to share life with you.